Friday, October 23, 2009

On That Whole Losing Weight Thing...

So, I am again at the beginning of my weight loss journey.  Unfortunately, this is not my first trip.  I have never been a skinny girl.  I can't remember a time when my thighs didn't rub together or when I could just pick up any old thing off the rack and know it would fit.  And it's not because I have zero short-term memory.  My biggest issues are that I like to eat and I don't exercise.  It's not like the whole "Why aren't these pants fitting?" thing is a real mystery.

I'm just not motivated by the being a healthy weight is good for me thing.  I never have been.  What I need is some reason to be motivated beyond that.  The good news is that I have some events coming up that I can use as motivation, the biggest one being that my little brother, Matt is marrying my amazing, gorgeous, built-like-she-was-made-to-hang-with-my-family sister-in-love, Mel, on June 12, 2010.  And I want to wear a cute dress and have the best time, and I know I won't be able to do that if I feel and look then like I do now.  I also want to set a good example of setting a goal and achieving it for my students.  So, I think I am going to make this struggle a little more public than I might otherwise, harnessing the power of a classroom full of weght-loss coaches who are as ruthless as Jillian but as loving as Bob.  On top of that, I have 23 months and counting until I turn the big 30.  I've always said I am going to throw myself one heck of a party for this big night, and if I am going to do that, I want to look good.  REALLY good.  So, if I'm going to make that happen, there's never been a better time to start.

I want to make clear that I am not one of those people who sits around and talks about how unattractive I am.  I am not saying that bigger can't be beautiful.  I have a decent self-image and I don't bash myself or support those who do.  What I am saying is that right now, I don't fit into my pants.  And I like my pants, so this is a little upsetting.  I have to do this, not because it is the socially conscious thing to do, but because it's the only way I am going to have clothes to wear to work because I have already made a promise to myself that I am not going to buy bigger pants. 

It's time.  Waistline, you are officially on notice. 


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