But I feel like New Year's Eve is all about that kiss at midnight, facing the idea of a whole new year to spend with one another. And what's the fun when you don't have anyone to kiss? New Year's happens to also be my little brother's birthday, so traditionally we all eat at Mom and Dad's. When we were younger all my parents' friends, plus my aunts and uncles would all watch movies and play board games while this kids played. Then, as I got older I started finding something to do, whether that was hang out with whatever friend stayed over or going somewhere. I think one of my favorite NYE was probably back in 8th grade, when we went to my cousin's and hung out with her brother and his friends. I remember thinking we were such big stuff for being allowed up there with boys and no parents (mind you, they were just across the field.) I mean, look at us, we were obviously trouble. (What's really troubling is the fashion and hair...I'm the one in the floor on the right)
What feels like a million years later, I sit here thinking about how, yet again, I won't have anyone to kiss at midnight--how I never have. And I think that would be one of the nicest feelings in the world. Maybe I am over romanticizing it. But, maybe I'm not.
I am all about ringing in a New Year. 2010 was a heck of a lot kinder than 2009. And I'm really excited about what lies ahead of me, because I believe it will be good. It's just that, if I were to be perfectly honest, it's getting harder and harder to believe that a man will come into my life over the course of a year. I know, I know, anything can happen. It's just getting harder to really believe that it actually will.
Needless to say, I won't be ringing in the New Year at a fancy party. I will, quite possibly, be ringing it in from the warmth of my bed in my fleece pjs, champagne in one hand and reruns on TV. And I'm okay with that, all in all. But just because I am okay with it, doesn't mean I won't be dreaming of something else when my head hits the pillow.