Mildred's Garden

 Mildred is a kind and patient woman and has the most amazing garden (which is really most of her yard).  I am so thankful that she lets me come out and roam around.  Here's some of what I found on Saturday...

Mother's Day

Officially, I am not a mother.  I have not birthed or adopted or married into babies.  But, some days, I feel like a mama.  You can't help it when you spend your days trying to lovingly direct kids down the right path.  It's made for some really sweet and some amazingly heartbreaking moments in my life.  But today, I want to take a minute and honor some really fantastic moms. 

I've talked about my mom before.  I'm one of the lucky ones.  My mom always showed up in the ways that mattered.  She got me involved in theater when I was just 7, she came to every event, she embraced me when I made decisions that I knew weren't what she had hoped I would do (becoming a teacher, changing churches).  She is the person I talk to at least every other day (not counting when we are a work).  My mom rocks!

Depending on where I was in my life there have been "other mothers" who have shaped me. Women like Debbie, Nanny Pam, Sandy, my fabulous aunties, my grandmas. I have always been blessed to have lots of strong women in my life. I am inspired by my friends who are mothers; their grace under fire and sense of wonder and humor at the world (even when they don't feel like that's what's happening) is just awesome.

But one of those women who made me who I am passed away last night from cancer (oh, how I hate this disease!).  My godmother, Linda, was the sweetest woman I have ever known.  She lived just up the road and I can remember many a fun afternoon spent at her house playing with her boys and pulling the handle on the real nickel slot machine they had at their house.  Most of my childhood memories of birthdays or Catholic church are mingled in with memories of Linda.  She was my first Communion teacher.  She was the one that I feared I was letting down the most by leaving the Church.  Linda never failed to tell me how beautiful my voice was.  She used to say that she felt like she sang better when I was singing in the congregation.  She had a wonderful, perfume-y smell that trailed her when she left a room and a very distinctive voice and laugh.  The last time I saw her was at Easter, and we had a very nice visit.  I am so thankful that I have a good memory of her as the last one.  I am so sad for her family and I am sad for the world because we lost a truly amazing godly woman.  She leaves a legacy of faith and love. And isn't that the best we can ask for?

Transitions Are Useful, Just Not In This Post

I know, I know.  I'm being a blog slacker again.  So, to make up for it, I'm going to show you a bunch of pictures that aren't really related except that I took them all in the last few days. 

Let's start with Cinco de Mayo fun at Cerro de la Silla, aka Dora's. (Can we all agree that Dora knows how to throw a Cinco de Mayo celebration?)

Here's Casey...she's a blogger now too...dinner was her idea...

See, she even brought the cupcakes...

Timmy and Megan.  I feel this is representative of their relationship (Tim doing something silly, and Megan just laughing at him)...

Juan...not entirely sure what he was doing.  But I loved this picture.

Chris and Crys (also a blogger)...This is fairly representative of their marriage.

After dinner, and a large peach margarita that temporary relieved my dislike of people (dinner company not included), I went back to the studio with Sheena.  It's really coming along.  It won't be long now until I'm sitting at my cute little desk pretending to be a secretary!  You can see more over at her blog...

We've come a long way from that first day of renovation!

And finally, with no real transition ('cause that's how I like it and it's my blog), here's a picture of one of the hundred or so roses that are blooming on the rose bush that just won't die.  It's been mowed over and generally treated badly because of it's size and location in my yard, but it's prettier this year than I ever remember it.  So, yeah...enjoy the flower.

Tomorrow, I am getting up at the crack of dawn (or 7:30) to head to the state track meet.  It should at least be interesting because we are taking three of Chell's four daughters with us.  I'm sure I will have a few fun shots to share of that.  And Sunday, (Mother's Day) I am taking my brother and sis-in-law-to-be's engagement photos at the farm.  Who knows what you'll find here by the end of the weekend?  Gotta leave you wanting more somehow! (Ha!)

Happy Cinco de Mayo

I'm excited about going to dinner tonight with my friends.  I say this because I need something to look forward to because thus far, this day has been a disappointment.  Nothing major, just a bunch of little things not going right and it's starting to wear on me a bit. 

I know I've been a real Debbie Downer in recent posts.  There's just a lot of stuff going on, most of which isn't stuff I am able to post about.  I feel like I'm failing as a teacher and as a person in general because I can't seem to get my crap together and when I manage to nothing goes right.  I know it will be okay, but I have never been one of those people who thrived under stress.   I'm good in a crisis and I like to play it close to the deadline, but if I feel stressed I just kind of shut down.  And I have too much going on to be in the corner in the fetal position.

In other words, I'm so glad that Casey planned this little get together tonight to celebrate Cinco de Mayo and our friend, Juan's half birthday.  I just have to behave myself because I do have to be at work in the morning...

I've Had A Real Good Time, But This Wasn't It.

      The thing about teaching in a junior high/high school setting is that it means that you are somewhat permanently stuck in high school.  Of course, I have my theories about how we never really leave that mindset (you should talk to my grandma at the assisted living center),  but there is just something about finding yourself in the drama day in and day out as an adult.  If you are lucky enough, you are in it and not of it thankfully.  But it just can't help but bring back how you felt about high school.  I've mentioned before that high school was not the time of my life.  I didn't suffer, it hasn't scarred me for life or anything, but it wasn't golden.  I know for some people it really is.  Some even camp there the rest of their lives, clutching their "glory days" with all they have.  My experiences in high school were kind of removed from where I went because my closest friends went somewhere else for the most part.  I was the girl who people didn't really have a problem with (except when I ran my mouth), but who didn't get invited to the parties either.  I just didn't really know who I was yet.  My identity was wrapped up in the people around me, and it wasn't until I was much older that I started to really be who I was meant to be.  (Some days, that's still an issue.) 

I say all that to say this:  High school is hard.  I think when we get removed from it and we are likely to say, "Oh, they don't know how good they have it."  And, mostly they don't.  All I wanted was to be a grown up and now I would gladly go back to a time when there weren't bills to pay and responsibilities calling.  But, I think we (as adults) also have to remember that even if these dramas seem silly to us, they are very real to people living them.  When you are breaking up with your first serious boyfriend or fighting with your friend, it hurts.  And that's probably because it's the first taste of "the real world."  Those high school experiences are the first time we faced betrayal or making the right decision even if it's the hard one.  And that seems like a very big deal at the time.  Who am I kidding?  It still seems awfully big now and I'm well past those times.  And that's not even considering that some of these kids are facing things they aren't sharing, like absentee parents and pressures to look and feel and be a certain way. 

Every day, I see a couple hundred faces in the halls and I wonder what will become of them.  Perhaps I should be worrying a little more about who they are now and what I can do to help.

My Summer Project

It is decided.  This will be the summer that I learn to cook.  I mean, I can sort of cook now, in that I can read directions and execute them with some success.  But I want to really learn how to cook.  I think that Pioneer Woman looks like a real jumping off point.  Her recipes are fairly easy to understand and they aren't super difficult.  I also think that I am going to get some of the family recipes together too, because I like that kind of tradition.  I feel like maybe I should learn to can something too, because that's a dying art and my grandma is really good at it.  I may even start a sister blog to record my successes (and possibly, my failures too).

I want this summer to be really enjoyed and not wasted away doing nothing.  I want to do some family history stuff with my dad, and more photography in general.  I just feel like I never really get anything accomplished during the summer other than stuff for work and while that's great and necessary, it's not everything.  My goal is for this to be a summer worth remembering, worth celebrating, and sharing.  I'm inching closer to my 30s every day and I just feel like if I don't do it now, when will I?

So, brave friends, I'm calling you and your stomaches to my test kitchen and to my summer in general.  Let's make this one for the record books!

And Now For Something Unbearably Cute...

If this face doesn't make you smile...

Try this one....

Or maybe you need a good laugh...

Remember, tomorrow's Friday!!